Rudolph,
The Zombie Reindeer
Sung to the tune of “Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer”He ate Dasher, then Dancer,
Then Prancer and Vixen.
He downed Comet and Cupid
And Donner and Blitzen.
Yes, he ate them all, the most
Famous undead reindeer of all:
Rudolph, the zombie reindeer,
Caught the virus through his nose.
And if you ever saw him,
You would even say he’s gross.
All of the other reindeer
Tried real hard to get away.
But they didn’t count on Rudolph
Eating them anyway.
Then one foggy Christmas Eve,
Santa came to say:
“Rudolph, with your Zombie blight,
Who’s gonna pull my sleigh tonight?”
Rudolph instead just ate him,
Munching Santa’s brain with glee,
Rudolph, the zombie reindeer,
You changed Christmas history
This is my personal favorite (^_^)
Zombie Wonderland
(Sung to the tune of “Winter Wonderland”)
Undead moan, are you listening?
In the lane, blood is glistening.
A horrible sight,
We’re screaming tonight,
Runnin’ through a Zombie wonderland.
Already turned, is our neighbor!
Zombies here, I belabor.
They moan their own song,
As we scream along,
Sprintin’ through a Zombie wonderland.
In the meadow we can beg for mercy.
They’ve already eaten Parson Brown.
They’ll come for us next
And we’ll say, “No man!”
We’re getting the hell
Out of this town.
Later on, we’ll perspire
As we scream by the fire.
I’ll say we’re afraid
Of the Zombies they’ve made,
Runnin’ through a Zombie wonderland.
Deck the Halls with Parts of Wally
(Sung to the tune of “Deck the Halls with Boughs of Holly”)
Deck the Halls with Parts of Wally
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
“Tis the season for brains by golly,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Chew we now our friend’s gray matter,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Wear old clothes ‘cause fresh brains splatter,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
See the blazing town before us,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Let’s go in and eat the chorus,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Follow me, we eat with leisure,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
A fresh brain for our Yuletide pleasure.
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Slay Ride
(Sung to the tune of “Sleigh Ride”)
Chorus I
Just hear those fresh brains jingling,
And nostrils running with goo.
Come on, it’s lovely weather
To go flesh-eating together with you.
Chorus II
Outside the bodies are falling
And Zombies are calling “woo-hoo”.
Come on, it’s lovely weather
To go flesh-eating together with you.
Take a bite, take a bite, take a bite, let’s go.
Here’s a leg with a shoe,
We’re riding in a wonderland of ooze.
Take a chomp, take a chomp, take a chomp, it’s grand;
An ear’s in my hand.
We’re gliding along with a song
Of a Zombie wonderland.
Their cheeks are nice and tasty
And brains are basting you see.
We’re snuggled up together
Like two flesh-eaters would be.
Let’s take that road before us
And eat a chorus or two.
Come on, it’s lovely weather
To go flesh-eating together with you.
There’s a Zombie party at the home of Farmer Gray.
His brain’ll be the perfect ending of a perfect day;
We’ll be eating the parts we love to eat without a single stop
At the fireplace while we watch the eyeballs pop.
Pop! Pop! Pop!
There’s a happy feeling nothing in the world can buy
When they pass around a femur and somebody’s eye—
It’ll be just like a picture print by undead Currier and Ives,
Theses wonderful brains are the brains
We’ll be eating all through our lives!
Repeat Chorus I & II
It’s lovely weather to go flesh-eating together with you.
It’s lovely weather to go flesh-eating together with you.
Here Comes Zombie Claus
(Sung to the tune of “Here Comes Santa Claus”)
Here comes Zombie Claus, here comes Zombie Claus,
Right down Zombie Claus Lane!
Vixen and Blitzen and his undead reindeer
are eating all the brains
Bells are ringing, children screaming;
All is bloody and bright.
Load your shotgun and say your prayers,
‘Cause Zombie Claus comes tonight.
Here comes Zombie Claus, here comes Zombie Claus,
Right down Zombie Claus Lane!
He’s got a bag that is filled with brains,
And we don’t know where he’s been.
Hear those sleigh bells jingle-jangle
What a horrible night.
Jump in bed, hold onto your head,
‘Cause Zombie Claus comes tonight.
Here comes Zombie Claus, here comes Zombie Claus,
Right down Zombie Claus Lane!
He doesn’t care if you’re rich or poor;
He’ll eat you just the same.
Zombie Claus knows we’re all just protein;
That makes everything right.
So fill your shotgun up with shells
‘Cause Zombie Claus comes tonight.
Here comes Zombie Claus, here comes Zombie Claus,
Right down Zombie Claus Lane!
He’ll come around when the screams ring out
That there’re fresh brains again.
Zombie virus will come to all
If we just cower in fright.
So let’s give thanks to Smith and Wesson,
‘Cause Zombie Claus comes tonight.
Well I hope you all enjoyed these carols as much as I did. Just a little something to make your holiday a little bit ghoulier! Merry Zombieka to all! And remember, when in doubt, aim for the brain!
The Huntress Fan, signing off.
